I can remember as a child hearing the ringing of bells bouncing off the hills and homes of my bucolic, suburban neighborhood and suddenly recognizing the familiar tune of The Entertainer coming from the ice cream truck. But by the time I heard it, the driver had often already passed my house and was heading the other direction. In a cruel way it seemed I could always hear his song for much longer after he was leaving the neighborhood and the sticky sweetness of his offerings were out of my reach and out of my sight. That's the way summer has always struck me. Before you know it it's right there, almost sneaking up on you. But the moment you realize it's there and start to sink into its luxury and comfort, it seems to trail off into the distance with fall fast on its heels...the summer song moves father and father away, the acoustics become distorted and strange as it moves beyond our reach and out of earshot.
The theme of summer 2019 was definitely over-indulgence. Too many vacations. Too much wine. Too much shopping (albeit, always at a bargain.) Too much stuffing my belly with anything and everything that appeared delectable. For so many years of my life, I have eaten in a restricted, regimented fashion. Initially, this was in large part due to my first career and the pressures of maintaining specific measurements and sizes for my fashion clients and agents. Then, with age, those restrictions have become more self-driven as I have try to escape the realities of the post-baby body, a slowing metabolism and now, due to my ongoing cancer medication, early onset menopause. But this summer (strange choice right in the middle of bikini season) I threw caution and constraint to the wind and consumed, sipped and cherished all the things that had once been so off-limits in my cupboard (mostly in the form of starchy, carby goodness.) I felt I deserved it after the beatdown of 2018. When faced with a tough decision like, "Should I have more wine?" or "Should I have another scoop of ice-cream?" I would quickly answer these silly questions with a resounding "I should treat myself!" and dig in.
I dug in a lot. And that digging in has continued on through the holidays. Now I'm digging in my heels...which I know is cliche given that it's new year resolution season. What I've learned from my exercise in excess is that too much of a good thing can certainly be too much. Believe it or not, I am over all that indulging. It's not just the softness of my belly or the tightness of my jeans, or the extra space in my bank account that encouraged this about-face. Turns out it's just not as much fun to always feel satiated and spoiled. Rules, parameters, guidelines and self control help the sweeter moment (and bites) seem even sweeter. So with my summer (and Christmas) songs behind me this seems like the perfect time to reign it back in. Less drinking. Less eating. Less shopping. Less over-indulging. More clarity and peace.